Disintegrate

I started working on the first version of this canvas in 2008. It was a very different thing back then. There have so many iterations since then, which have veered in wildly diffuse directions. The paint is separating and almost curdling on the canvas, while scraps of the previous iterations are just visible here and there.

It seems odd to me that disintegration has negative connotations - its association with decay perhaps, or our resistance to anything impermanent. In many ways ‘disintegrate’ is a passive version of ‘disentangle, a word which holds a sense of relief, or escape. Over the twelve years that this painting has evovled, I have been integrated into (and subsequently disentangled from) different cities, jobs, relationships. I am no longer integral in places where I once was. I don't see that as a negative thing, or positive. It’s simply a change.